Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Spotty Biscotti

Spotty BiscottiSpotty Biscotti

______I've been digging the knee-high socks trend I've been stumbling across here and there on the mighty interwebs, and so I wanted to jump on that bandwagon, hopefully without striking too much of a resemblance to an anime waitress character. Speaking of, I'm thinking of donning a Sailor Scout costume for Halloween.  We have a short Fall Break and I'll be able to give out Halloween candy to the kidlets this year (along with devouring half of it myself, of course). I'm debating whether or not I will go as the aforementioned Sailor Pluto or a sexy 80 year old version of me.

______Decisions, decisions.

Spotty BiscottiSpotty BiscottiSpotty Biscotti

______Last week, something super awful happened. I was in the printmaking shop, painting an artfully skewed version of my face using a few inks and acrylics, and all seemed to be going smoothly.  However, I made a sudden movement and tapped a tiny jar of yellow India ink over, and it splattered against the linoleum floor, splattered on the table legs, and splattered on my... my Jeffrey Campbell patent leather oxfords...

______Dramatic pause.

______In that moment of panic, I was quick to clean up the floors and tables first with the help of some darling friends in the room (because I don't want to be that art punk who leaves messes around like a spoiled ten year old, heeeell noh!). A few dozen squirts of foul-smelling cleaning products later, the rubbery floors were spotless, if not for a slightly sickening yellow tint left behind. I swiftly moved toward my shoes, attempting to use the same cleaning products, and hypothesizing a result in terms of ink removal. But alas! The yellow stain only became yellower and bled further, and I panicked, and I panicked, and I panicked.  My hands flailing about and my mouth suddenly making incoherent dying whale noises, my friend acted, fearing what was left of my sanity. She promptly phoned her brother, who is a fashionable dude and shoe expert, and he was quick to inform us that rubbing alcohol was the answer to my inky dilemma.

______And so I flopped, and I wobbled, and I awkwardly stumbled toward the closet full of printmaking chemicals. I snatched the rubbing alcohol and drenched a paper towel in the liquid magic and dabbed furiously at my shoes.

______And little by little, like smoke dissipating quietly into the sky, the yellow began to fade, and the precious cream and black of my shoes returned, shine and all.

Spotty Biscotti
Spotty Biscotti
Spotty Biscotti

______It was quite traumatizing and I nearly gave up.  You guys have any similar moments of panic over worldly objects?

Spotty Biscotti

Socks: via Nordstrom Rack
Dress, heels: via Ross
Todos los jewelries: Charming Charlie

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

A Pioneer of Paisleys + Firmoo Review


______Firmoo, an online glasses company that I'm sure many of you have heard of, sent me over a pair of prescription glasses, and just in time, because I tossed my last pair of contacts the other day. Now I can live in these for a few days until I decide to crack open a new box o' eyeball lenses...

______I really enjoy the color and size of these, though. Nice and sturdy too. Excellent for accidentally falling asleep in. I usually go for black glasses because then they're more apparently nerdy, but these tortoise ones have a pinch of class to them that black lacks. Not so harsh, either. I like 'em lots. Firmoo now offers a way to try on glasses virtually by simply uploading a straight-on view of your face, which super helpful since a photo isn't always the best indicator or size and shape and such. In addition, with their First Pair Free program, you can get yourself a pair for nothing!


______I spent this past weekend cutting a bajillion (okay, more like a hundred) squares. These art classes, man. Makin' me think in all sorts of weird new ways. Rather than working on something ginormous, I've been passing the time squabbling with swatches of fabric. By fabric, I mean my bedsheets. Sorry, mom.


______Other than that, I've been feeling pretty ajdhakjsdsdfgdsf;; (yes, you read that correctly--I have been feeling keyboardsmash). Whenever I eat, my stomach ends up hurting, burning, or cramping in some manner, almost like there are two miniature martians inside me battling fiercely for whatever food ends up in there. That's the cutest and least miserable description I can whip up of the situation. I've got a doctor's appointment scheduled on Halloween, which is great since that means I'll (hopefully) be diagnosed with something soon, but at the same time, that's a whole week away, and I kind of wish I could be feeling better now!


Dress: Minkpink (similar)
Heels: Jeffrey Campbell "Williams" Oxford
Glasses: c/o Firmoo
Socks: Target
Necklace: Charming Charlie
Hairpin: World Market

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Zelda's Lullaby


 ______If I can make a Zelda or a Pokemon reference, you guys know that I will. And if I realize that I subconsciously formulated an outfit that maybe-sorta-if-you-stretch-it looks like it could pass for something straight outta one of the aforementioned nerdy categories, you know I'm gonna mention it.

______That being said, after viewing these photos on the computer, I kind of felt like I was embodying one of the many reincarnations of Princess Zelda. Blonde hair brushed back, magenta dress, golden yellow accessories, maybe I'm seeing what's not even there, don't care, don't care, pineapple with flair.

______Sorry. I'm taking an Honors poetry course this semester and rhyming's quite prevalent in early century poetry.


______I wish I had more compelling things to relay to you guys other than, "Welp, I've been working on two papers and multiple experimental art projects!," but alas, I don't.  From dusk 'till dawn, I've been more occupied with schoolwork than Paula Deen would be if she were transported to a medieval butter-churning hall (did those exist? we can pretend, but don't quote me on it).

______The only "me time" I've had is my bike rides in the morning, but that's much better than nothing at all, and so I'm thankful for what I can get.  Heck, if I can sleep sufficiently, nosh healthily, and obtain an hour of exercise every day, then I'm happy and slowly flourishing. If I lacked any of the aforementioned elements, I'm sure I'd be about as pleasant as a turd in a washing machine.

______And my friends, a washing machine teeming with turds doesn't seem like much of a pleasant discovery. You're very welcome for that visual. I'm actually a lady who lacks grace and elegance, but I cover that up with swishy dresses and heels that make authoritative click-clacks over concrete.


______Do you radiant little gems have any daily rituals that keep you sane?


Dress: via Modcloth
Anchor belt: via Lotus Boutique (similar)
Socks: Forever 21
Necklace: Charming Charlie
Ankle boots: ShopRuche, Chelsea Crew

Thursday, October 10, 2013


Bendwarp, acrylic on paper with wood backing, 3' x 7',
Fall 2013, Drawing Concepts 

______One thing I've learned through my Drawing Concepts class is that I enjoy making things on a large scale. Not overwhelmingly oppressive to the point where they stoop over you like a very threatening Porta Potty that's about to spill it's portable pottyness over on ya, but enough so that they can almost regard you and invite you toward them--I guess slightly larger than the size of a human would be the best way to describe it. Maybe that scale will increase one day. This guy is 7' tall and 3' wide, which isn't ginormous, but it's larger than what I'm used to.

______So this is my latest and second project for the class: something that depicts the act of it's making. The actual making of this product involved me walking around a podium wrapped in paper making sporadic yet gestural marks with a paintbrush as many times as I felt was necessary. In person, it's much easier to see where the bends on the angular podium were previously present--an impressed I liked t o show, and which remained present even after ironing the paper out. Pictures never seem to do big things much justice.

Bend (detail)

______My friend, Greg, snapped a photo of me in the process of it all. It was a very dizzy ordeal, for sometimes I would be swallowed by the act of circle-making and move around the podium so rapidly that the lines would shake and twist before me.  I just about toppled over half a dozen times.

______...Worth it.

______The curve was constructed from a combination of short wooden planks and some supple wood siding bent with picture wire, sort of like an archer's bow. Pew pew, you sassy little turds.


Saturday, October 5, 2013

Witchy Woman


______Some days, I want to dress myself like I'm some kinda fairy princess, wrapping myself in white and crowning my head with flowers, all while floating through the world like the most delicate of bubbles. Other days, I want to embrace my dark side (do I have one?), veiling myself in black and gold and probably turning naïve children into toads as I saunter evilly between the shadows cast by buildings.

______This is one of those other days.


______I don't know how people wear bras with shirts like this. Black will show, nude will show, silicon bras make boob-lacking folk like me look lumpier than a lump of coal, and no bra results in pokey pea nipples.  You just can't win.

______Midterms are coming, which is odd since I'm quite certain I just started the semester. I've got a lucky two papers due in the next few weeks, two writing tests, and two artist presentations. If you think being an Honors-based Art major is easy, let me know so I can purchase a tote-full of rotten fruit to toss furiously in your general direction. I am suffering slowly, but I suppose it's a happy, artsy kind of suffering.


Top: Know Style
Skirt: Charlotte Russe
Boots: Report
Earrings: Charming Charlie
Spike bracelet: via Nordstrom Rack

Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Beauty Box Five

BB5 Review

_____Beauty Box Five is a program that sends you a monthly box chock-full of five different beauty goodies, ranging from drugstore to vegan brands, in order to introduce you to a wonderful world of new items. The people behind it sent me a sample for review and to present to you snuggly little turds, and my package was quick to arrive in just a few days!

BB5 Review
BB5 Review

_____Two nail products were supplied--a Swissco nail file, which works as any nail file should, and hot pink shade of nail polish, Nubar Nail Laquer. The nail polish goes on nice and thick, and is definitely a good quality brand opposed to those that chip off quickly (plus, it's vegan and animal cruelty-free!). I've had some on my nails for half a week now and it's still looking rather decent--that's impressive coming from an art major who is always dealing with hands-on activities (and you know, the constant slaying dragons that I do).

BB5 Review

_____I also received two moisturizers. I really dig the Heavenly Silk Daily Skin Lotion, and have been massaging it into my hands whenever I think of it. I have a terrible habit of picking at my nails and the skin around them and instead for the past few days I've been rubbing this on instead. I adore this stuff. It's buttery and leaves your skin smooth without being greasy. Fab-oo-liss.

_____I'm not too familiar with collagen moisturizers since I've never actually used any before (I'm 20! I don't want to think about obtaining wrinkles just yet! I'm still single and alooooone), but this h20+Aquafirm Micro-Collagen Moisturizer seems to moisturize my skin pretty well. And I can't say it doesn't work since I have yet to see any wrinkles, so...

BB5 Review

_____The last thing I plucked from this pretty aqua box was a neutral shade of Be a Bombshell Eyeshadow... and oh yes, this is prime quality stuff. The eyeshadow itself is highly pigmented, long-lasting, and goes on as smoothly oil pastels over thick paper (for you non-artsy people, that just means it goes on reaaaaaaaal nice). I think this was my favorite of all the items since it's difficult to locate an eyeshadow that doesn't get all up in your eyelid crevices. I might have to switch over to this stuff.

_____Well folks, there's my two cents on these products and the neat little company. I adore the concept of receiving five goodies every month, but I can't say it's something I would personally subscribe to for a long period of time. I think if there was someway you could select five items from a list of perhaps an optional twenty that it would be much more satisfying. Either way, click here to check out Beauty Box Five for yourself!

BB5 Review

(*products were provided by Beauty Box Five, but sassy opinions are my own)